why are you doing this to me, am i not living up to what i'm supposed to be?

so i have been feeling a little sacado de la onda lately. i have been kayaking with some friends, and it really helped, i felt rejuvenated and happy. came back to work and things just didn't seem to keep up. it is always hard when you realize that people don't see you or think about you the way that you think they do, and harder when you realize that you're not the kind of person that you thought that you were...